He's on his own

Well, he moved out again. This is his house/apartment. He shares it with about 5 other fellas and he is happy.

I know it's been a while

But look what's coming home on my son!!!!!

I am sure that it is not worth what he went through to get it, but he has received the combat patch. (Or pin, it kinda looks pin-ish to me.) Anyhow, Macade is in the USA!!! He made it! I have talked to him several times since I last posted. (I know, Mom of the year, right?) He is good and happy to be coming home so soon.

So, to backtrack a bit, things have been very busy for our boys the last few weeks. The work they were doing was very dangerous and there were a few accidents. Unfortunately, Macade was a part of one of them. He and a companion, hit an 80-100 lb IED on their 2nd to last mission. They both walked away with concussions miraculously. Their truck was destroyed. Whatever Cades mission is on this earth, it is a good one. He has been protected many times over the past year. We feel very blessed and will deal with each day one at a time as he tries to become a civilian once again.

Thank you all so much for your prayers for Macade and for us. I, personally, have truly felt each and every one over the last 6 months. His first 6 months out were especially difficult for me as I tried to find a place where I could accept that he was at war and still live my life here. I will admit, I was not very successful at this at all and I appreciate everyone's patience with me. (Especially my husband.) After Cades leave time in Jan-Feb, something changed for me and even after the call about his blast, I knew he would be OK. This doesn't mean that I was OK with it. In fact, it took me a few days and a few phone calls from him, to let myself relax a little. But I have been the grateful recipient of many prayers. Thank you.

SOOOO, for being fired upon in combat, Macade wears this new symbol. I am proud of him! And I am very happy that he is on his way home!

A phone call! A phone call!

Yes, you are reading this correctly. I, Becky, have received a call from my son, SPC Moore, from across the world! How did this happen, you ask? He actually went down to the rec room and figured out how to use the phone..... wow!
So excited!
He sounds tired and ready to come home. He mentioned a few things that I will jot down quickly. He sent his box home. That's a good sign. That means there is not very much longer at all. I will not comment on dates as all of you know how much I hate dates. They come and go and are worse than if you didn't even know them before. Anyhow, we are planning on having our hero home in July sometime.
He talked a little bit about his best cousin Braiden, that left Wednesday for his mission to Canada. They will miss each other a lot but they realize this is how things are and they look forward to meeting again in a couple of years.
Macade talked about airsofting and how he has formed a team with a fellow soldier. I told him this will be good for the both of them because it will give them a chance to vent to each other about things we can't begin to comprehend. He said that was true. He said he wasn't feeling like he's doing anything other than his job right now, but when he comes home and thinks about things he has seen and done, it will get "weird".
He talked about going on a few trips and enjoying life for a bit. When I asked him if he would want to go to Colorado with us sometime, he asked if we would be driving there. I told him that is what we usually do... and he said he would meet us there. He is flat out tired of being in a vehicle for 14 hours a day. I hadn't given much thought to that, but can you imagine??? Bless his sweet soul for doing this for our country. Amazed.
I will be thinking about Macade, those that serve with him and those we have lost this weekend. It is a very emotional time for me as I consider all that has been sacrificed for my freedoms.

Reintegration!

Sterling, Nina and I spent some time this past weekend at a reintegration yellow ribbon lunch. I gotta say, it is tough to listen to. I am sure glad they are honest with us but at the same time it is terrifying what we have to look forward to. At this meeting, we were able to ask a panel of professionals and soldiers and a wife questions about coming home and how it will affect our families. They shared a lot of important information. They pretty much confirmed that most, if not all, of these men will deal with some PTSD at some level. I loved that they reminded us to be kind and patient with each other all the time. That we should be willing to listen day or night to whatever our soldier has to tell us. I feel liked Macade is pretty lucky to just be coming home to a clean slate. He has no wife or children to try to re acclimate to. I do hope he does not spend a lot of time alone. Family and friends, I would ask that you all be willing and able to listen, not talk, but listen when he needs someone to talk to. I recall that one man was asked in church how he was doing after deployment. He said he was fine and appreciated the man asking. But then the man asked if he had ever been in a fire fight out there. This soldier lost it in church. He felt like this man had no right to ask him such a personal question. He f-bombed him in church!! Yikes! So, I think it is important for everyone to realize that Cade gets asked some of the most rude, personal, and thoughtless questions on a daily basis when he is home. Let's be part of the solution IF he wants to talk about it. Please don't ask him questions that he may not want to respond to. I am sure it will be an adventure around here for a while, but we are educating ourselves and trying to be prepared. We love you all and thank you all for your support.

Hit and Miss

So, Cade has sent me a few short emails. Mostly just talking about how he is so ready to come home. He is very grateful to everyone still sending packages and letters. You must know that mail day is a good day or a bad day. Please don't forget to send him mail...PLEASE. emails are great but a nice written letter can be packed around with him all day. He wanted me to remind EVERYONE, to please not talk to people about what he is doing there. I know this is tough, cause I want to talk to everyone about it, but please for his safety and protection, do not discuss this with anyone. You can tell folks that he does "route clearance", but nothing more please. He could get in a lot of trouble this way. He says to tell everyone hi and that he can't wait to see you all. Please everyone, pray for an end to this government shutdown nonsense. It wouldn't make even less sense at all for him to be there without pay. Thanks everyone!

No news....at all

OK so he called Nina. I knew I would be second to a girl sometime. She says he was OK. It was a long week and he was tired, but he talked her leg off for an hour or so. ($$$$) O well. Not my worry right? So, the latest, via Nina, is that he is alive and well.

O Cade

Cade is in the middle of a Ping Pong Tournament with Poland.

Who does that?

I heard from the red head

It is funny how I get a little cranky when I have not heard from him in a spell. (Sterling would say it is NOT funny.)
Anyhow, as usual, not much to say. He is just very optimistic about the time going by quickly. He has joined a ping pong club and is pretty busy with that in his down time, I guess. They do some of the darnedest things to pass the time. He still is not getting mail, but is confident he will. So, I send on.
I think he is just getting online long enough to email me once in a while and Nina a lot. So, no pictures coming through for sure.
It sounds like things are a little slower for them right now. Hopefully it stays that way.

Very little out of A.

So, there is very little info coming out of A. I like to think this is because all those dirty little buggers are hiding out of the cold. Macade says, in some short emails, that things are good, cold, muddy and a little boring right now. And that is just fine with me. They spend their down time making odd shaped snow things. (You don't want me to go into detail, I promise.) He has been thinking a lot about what he wants to do when he gets home. I think being here for leave really got him considering his future. He has been given responsibility of his own wrecker, which he is very excited about. AND, he has not received any mail yet. Total downer for me as I have been sending stuff for about 2 weeks now. Hopefully he gets them soon. For now I think he is using the free internet in the rec room to email home and Nina. So, things are good. Our family is doing well. It really did soothe our souls to see him alive and well. Thanks to all of you and your prayers on his behalf.

Another goodbye down!

So, we are getting pretty good at this goodbye stuff. There were hardly any tears even. (Mostly from me of course.) Cade said goodbye to everyone on his own terms. No party or fanfare. Just simply, "I'll see you soon"'s. He is back in Hell. I haven't talked to him personally yet. But I got a quick email from him saying it was ok at the new place. I am pretty sure I will get more info from Nina when I see her. Thanks to everyone that took some time to see Cade. It really meant a lot to him to see you all.
5 MORE MONTHS!

I'm cranky and I know it

As the hours creep by...
I just get sad

OK wait!!!

Can this week move any faster?!

Seriously

Can this week move any slower????

Yippee!!

1 week baby! 1 week til I can give you the biggest hug ever! So excited to see your face, smell you, (yes, even covered in Afghani dust), and listen when you need to talk. I love you and cannot wait for NEXT week!

Excitement!

So I have been trying to cut and paste this for a while now, but being as I am so computer literate, you get my version of the email Cade sent me. It went something like this.
"I have been very busy so things are crazy at best. I have been traveling a lot and staying elsewhere. But guess what????????????? I found my first IED!!! This is not a story for now but will tell you all about it when I get home. It was a big one. Yay me, almost everyone has heard about it. I am proud of myself:) Keepin my boys safe:)"
So this is the kind of emails I get from him. Short, sweet and "dropping a bomb". He was so excited about this IED, that I couldn't help but feel happy for him through my hysteria that he was sweeping for bombs! (Not sure if he came across it by accident?) If I know Cade, he has been offering to do anything to get himself out of the garage.
So, I am good with this surprisingly. His energy is contagious. I am glad he feels like he saved his friends.
He has all but quit calling and skyping at this point. :( But I understand too. We are down to 15 days now and I think he is trying to keep his head in Afghanistan. He is very excited to see all of you. Thanks for your support.

Look out!!!

Yes, it's a monkey!

And my personal favorite, the convoy stopped for a herd of camels!

Cade, you aren't in Utah anymore....

After Much Concern...

I have decided to post some details. Not in an effort to freak anyone out, but to be true to this record. I have thought a lot about it and I think that in an effort to keep this as some sort of journal, I need to put in some detail. So if you are a worrier or a Grandma (or both) I will warn you ahead of time when I am going to write something bothersome. I have also decided it might be therapeutic for me to get it off my chest without having to call and cry to someone. That being said, Grandma's look no further.
Christmas was not what I had envisioned. I knew that it would never be the same of course. However, I had planned on getting the family together and Skyping and laughing and crying with Cade. Our plans were derailed on Christmas Eve when I was doing some instant messaging with him. He had had a long week. I could tell just by the things he was saying. I never try to press him for details. I think he will talk as he feels he can. I told him I was sorry he was struggling, to which he responded, "I mean, I know it is hard to see a copper wire in the dark, but I trust these guys to clear the area." As you can imagine, my heart fell into my shoes and I was glad we were not speaking by phone. I asked if it had triggered anything and he said "no, just made my heart stop." I am looking forward to getting the full story when he gets home. (Sick, I know.) I have no idea why he did not get blown up! It makes me cringe to think that we may have spent a far different Christmas this year.
In the end, Macade felt like he was unable to talk with family for Christmas. He was going to work out. (Who works out on Christmas??) He mentioned being able to talk to everyone in person soon.
It really does seem like I just start to relax, when something like this comes up. It makes me remember that he is not just on some base fixing trucks. He is out recovering vehicles that if left for any amount of time, are laden with explosives. His job is scary! I would love to say that I will not worry from this point on, but that would be lying. I worry a lot. It is my only goal this year to let myself relax a bit and not worry so much. I have had to tell myself several billion times that there really is nothing I can do but let him know he is loved and supported back home. And then it is Gods hands. Just like he was on Christmas Eve.